Tokyo. January 7, 2023.
Following their negotiations in Munich earlier this week, which Kevin McCarthy said assured “peace for our time,” he and the "Freedom Caucus" flew to Tokyo. Here, in the wee hours of this morning (Eastern time in the USA, because both McCarthy and those who forced him to surrender are in the neo-Nazi “America First” movement and don’t think Japan should be permitted to have its own different time) , they met on the battleship Missouri and McCarthy signed his unconditional surrender.
The terms of Mr. McCarthy’s surrender grew ever more humiliating for him as the sides went through fourteen votes before finally getting his total capitulation on the fifteenth vote. (A little-noticed section of the surrender agreement states that the first order of business in the 118th Congress must be to name the number 14—the sum of his lossess—a “McCarthy,” as 12 is a “dozen” and 13 a baker’s dozen.")
News of the surrender was greated with joyous celebration by authoritarians and lunatics around the United States.
Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q, GA) celebrating with Kevin McCarthy (0, CA)
Following his surrender, “Speaker” McCarthy stood in obvious discomfort as new Democratic House Leader Hakeem Jefferies (D, NY) delivered a brilliant speech in which he enumerated all the positive things his party stands for. Mr. McCarthy was obviously unsure whether to risk the wrath of his barbarian members by applauding for undeniably good and overwhelmingly popular values and objectives.
Not funnaaaaay!
This writer, a history teacher, needs to go back to school. He needs to polish up not only on his history, but also on his deportment. This snide little tale should be sent to time out.
Perhaps the author is a captive of business-as-usual Washington, DC. “The usual” in DC is personified by former-Speaker Pelosi. She whipped her minions into shape in advance of any floor debate over her leadership. Her Speaker victory was by then a foregone conclusion. Think Stalin, and his dictatorship’s 100% victory margins in their elections. Also, was it possible for a rookie Member to initiate a vote of no confidence against the previous Speaker (as they may do now under the new Speaker)? Nope. While she reigned, she was as immovable as the Kremlin’s Uncle Joe was.
This author makes fun of the 14 votes, leading up to Speaker McCarthy’s victory. As a small “d” democrat, I happen to support and promote elections, and voting freely. McCarthy’s election win was never a done deal. Democracy is not a done deal, either. It is worked out, through dialogue, and often via negotiation and dealmaking. That’s what I saw happening throughout those 14 votes.
The author’s suggestion that McCarthy is an appeaser, akin to British Prime Minister Chamberlain’s kowtowing to Adolf Hitler, is baseless hyperbole. The new Speaker and House GOP Members debated, negotiated, cut deals on their party’s legislative rules, policy planks and future legislative aims.
The writer doth protest too much, about democracy itself. To paraphrase a wise US politician, my advice to this wrong-way educator is: Fill out a “Hurt Feelings Report” and move on.